Please Hear My Confession

Please Hear My Confession, Michael N. Johns, 1/21/2015

Bless me, Heavenly Father, for I have sinned.
I don’t deserve any blessing, but I ask anyway.
It feels like it’s been a lifetime and a day
since my last confession,a prayer on the wind.
At life and love, I’m far from winning.

And since that time, I’ve failed continually,
Any “prayers” mentioned under my breath
Weren’t worth saying or repeating by me,
Or answering by You, at least not with a “yes.”
There is no end to all my sinning.

I’m sure I’ve had perpetually impure thoughts
About everyone, from Abbess to Zookeeper,
Mostly in passing traffic, daydreams, or the halls.
Feeling jealousy, murder, adultery and hate were
Not the end, just the beginning.

There is no love in my words or actions,
Except my narcissism, like it’s own religion.
It’s not my fault I think I’m near perfection
Until You show me Your expectations.
Then I’ve struck out, from first to seventh inning.

I’ve only gone from there to petty seeming things,
Wanting what I want, like a five-year-old,
With a temper running from thoughtless hot, to vengeful cold.
I am truly sorry for these and all my sins.
Without Your mercy, my soul is spinning.

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